The Secret Valor of Chickens

Of all the creatures in the world, the chicken is by far the most brave. For anyone that gives this any sort of thought, it should be obvious. Yet, sadly, chickens have gathered a bad name. In fact, they have gained a name meaning the opposite of brave. They are generally thought of as, well, chicken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Was it to get to the other side? Or perhaps it was running from a huge evil monster and the road just happened to be in the way. Without asking it, we'll never know. And if we do ask it, it probably won't tell. Chickens are wonderful at keeping secrets. No matter how much you threaten, no matter how much you try to get an answer from them, a chicken won't talk. A chicken will never share a secret. I know people that've blabbed because someone looked at them meanly. But, no, a chicken you can always trust.

If only more people could be chickens.

That would solve a multitude of our problems, not the least of which being that people are stupid. Even if they're a stupid chicken, who's going to give a chicken a job keeping track of The Red Button? Who's going to trust a chicken, of any intelligence, with escorting a visiting princess around town? Who's going to give a chicken any of these fun jobs that I think I'd like to try someday? Nobody. So if more people were chickens instead of people, the world would be a better place. Because people, as chickens, could be stupid without harming the rest of us.

Until it is realized just how special chickens really are. Then they might be voted in as our overlords. In which case I wouldn't want the stupid people to be chickens any longer. But if the people could turn into chickens, there wouldn't be much standing in the way at that point to turn them all into ducks, or tuna, or maybe an amoeba or three.

Yeah, more people should be chickens. At least then they'd be able to properly /earn/ their bad name.