Home, Home On The Range

Can I be a cowboy? I never really wanted to be a cowboy when I was younger, but today I think I'd like to try. It should be a lot of fun--playing the harmonica, sleeping under the stars. And always being a boy, even when I'm an old, old man. Yeah, I think that I want to be a cowboy.

So many upsides to it. I really like campfires. When I was a camp counselor, the least few years I got to lead the occasional campfire song, too. (Ok, so it was only one song per session of camp, and it was always the same song. And that was because none of the other counselors actually /knew/ the song. Which was silly, it wasn't even /my/ song, but I learned it from another guy that couldn't come back anymore.) Campfire songs are great. And cowboys get to sing lots of them!

And fresh air. Other than the constant smell of cow, which is pretty icky. Cows are one of the least-clean animals, I'm sure. Pigs have got to be hygienic compared to cows, which is really sad. Pigs get a bad name, when it comes to dirt, but that's only because they get left out in the mud. Cows /make/ the field all muddy--can't have much else after all the grass has either been eaten or stamped out. So I guess the air isn't /that/ fresh, but at least it isn't artificially processed. How can I know what buggies get added to the air in all these office buildings?

And cowboys don't have to pay for gas. Gas is expensive these days. So much cheaper to get the occasional bale of hay and a ton of random plantlife. No way that could be more expensive than having to fill up my car. Unless I were a cowboy with a really, really hungry horse. Or I left my wallet out--it might get confused and think the dollar bills were fairly tasty. But I think I could keep that from happening, I think it'll be so much cheaper to have a horse than a car. More fun too, 'specially if you get the horse with built-in CD player.

So, yes, there are a ton of benefits to being a cowboy. But my favorite has got to be the forever-a-boy thing. Without having to wear green tights, no less! Why bother wanting to be Peter Pan? Of course, if I'm forever a boy, I suppose I'd also forever be a cow. But I guess that everything has its tradeoffs.

Moo. Mooooooo!